Warning: Girl Screams ahead!
I have just realised a dream of mine within the past few weeks. I've always been the type to discourage myself, and to harbour a defeatist attitude when it came to doing the things that I really wanted to do. Perhaps it's partially a self esteem issue, partly laziness, I don't know. The only thing I do know is that it took a teenager from England that I haven't even met in real life to shake me up and tell me, "If you really want to do that, then you can find a way to do it." This was just the sort of kick in the ass that I needed, and from an unexpected source.
So I did it.
I joined a roller derby team.
*squeal!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!* <--girl scream
If you don't know what exactly that entails, it happens to be a lot of this:
And no, I'm not just doing this to have a valid excuse to wear fishnets and a tutu all the time, because my tattoos will fit in better in that type of environment, or even to meet hot lesbians. It's not just because I want to shop more often at Sock Dreams, though I admit that's good incentive. ;) Do you know how hard it is to find *my kind of people*? I know I've found a good many on the internet, but I think I may have actually finally found some in REAL LIFE, and that *maybe* I'm not such a freak after all! (Though I think I'll always be freaky. Rawr!) But seriously, *my* kind of people?
If you could suffer through Drew's insipid lisp to get the gist of what she was trying to say, she actually had it right. Roller derby is intensely physical, even dangerous! Those bitches make me feel wimpy! It's about female empowerment; it's about being accepted for who you are regardless of age, body type, ethnicity, education or socioeconomic background. You can be a newly separated mother of three with stretch marks and an ass that just won't quit and still be a roller girl! In fishnets!
So in a week and a half I start my vigorous eleven week training camp. I have no idea who is going to be watching my kids, or how I'm going to cope with sweating my ass off and still have to commute one hour each way all the while craving a shower like a common wharf doxy, but that's okay. Those things I will deal with as they come. The important thing is that I pursued a dream of mine, and I alone am making it a reality. If I end up crushing every bone in my body I'll be a happy, broken bitch when I'm in traction. That's something I can feel good about for the rest of my life. Now if I could just stop gagging and puking every time my mouth guard is in, I'd be all set... Pointers?