Friday, September 3, 2010

Meet: Holly Go Frightly!

Warning:  Girl Screams ahead!

I have just realised a dream of mine within the past few weeks.  I've always been the type to discourage myself, and to harbour a defeatist attitude when it came to doing the things that I really wanted to do.  Perhaps it's partially a self esteem issue, partly laziness, I don't know.  The only thing I do know is that it took a teenager from England that I haven't even met in real life to shake me up and tell me, "If you really want to do that, then you can find a way to do it."  This was just the sort of kick in the ass that I needed, and from an unexpected source.

So I did it.

I joined a roller derby team.

*squeal!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*  <--girl scream

If you don't know what exactly that entails, it happens to be a lot of this:

And no, I'm not just doing this to have a valid excuse to wear fishnets and a tutu all the time, because my tattoos will fit in better in that type of environment, or even to meet hot lesbians.  It's not just because I want to shop more often at Sock Dreams, though I admit that's good incentive. ;)  Do you know how hard it is to find *my kind of people*?  I know I've found a good many on the internet, but I think I may have actually finally found some in REAL LIFE, and that *maybe* I'm not such a freak after all!  (Though I think I'll always be freaky.  Rawr!)  But seriously, *my* kind of people?



If you could suffer through Drew's insipid lisp to get the gist of what she was trying to say, she actually had it right.  Roller derby is intensely physical, even dangerous!  Those bitches make me feel wimpy!  It's about female empowerment; it's about being accepted for who you are regardless of age, body type, ethnicity, education or socioeconomic background.  You can be a newly separated mother of three with stretch marks and an ass that just won't quit and still be a roller girl!  In fishnets!


So in a week and a half I start my vigorous eleven week training camp.  I have no idea who is going to be watching my kids, or how I'm going to cope with sweating my ass off and still have to commute one hour each way all the while craving a shower like a common wharf doxy, but that's okay.  Those things I will deal with as they come.  The important thing is that I pursued a dream of mine, and I alone am making it a reality.  If I  end up crushing every bone in my body I'll be a happy, broken bitch when I'm in traction.  That's something I can feel good about for the rest of my life.  Now if I could just stop gagging and puking every time my mouth guard is in, I'd be all set...  Pointers?

That's all,




Tsquared said...

Roller Derby was big in the late 60's and I loved it. The resurgence in the U.S and Canada of all female derby ( the old one was a LOT like the WWF) is awesome.

I am so absolutely thrilled that you are gonna do this, that I'd almost drag my ass up there to see you.

Enjoy yourself, and this place in life Darlin'!

Tsquared said...

Oh yeah - I flat laughed out loud at the "Clam Slam".

Anonymous said...

Shut up! Are you freakin' kidding me?! That is WAY awesome! And I didn't think you could be any hotter. I would SO come to see you whip some bitches around the rink. That's just pure hawtness right there.

I am practically geeking out over this :D

Twills said...

The Clam Slam is the all-lesbian league. I always get a kick out of that name, to the point of wanting to convert just so I can get the t-shirt. :P

Brans~Muffin said...

You are my Hero! I just got my ass kicked by a water Im def gonna be living vicariously through your posts...although I could at one time skate my ass off!

Leah. said...

Shut the fuck up! That is totally awesome! You will figure everything out. I always wanted to do something like that. I would get my ass creamed though :(

Renee Miller said...

You're awesome. That's all. Just awesome. Take pictures. You must!

Twills said...

Brans: You should check online to see if there's a team in your area. It's fun to watch, too.

Leah: You'd make a great jammer because you're small and you'd be able to slip through the pack easily.

Renee: I will try to get pictures, for sure. This needs to have photographic evidence.

Anonymous said...

Try storing your mouthguard in mouthwash. It might help a bit from wanting to puke!

Twills said...

Mouthwash? I've read that, but I'll try it out for sure. Thanks!

Pina said...

You fucking rock that ring, meat cheeks!!

Nanea said...

Your awesomeness leaves me feeling inadequate. I bow before you.

Anonymous said...

excellent points and the details are more specific than elsewhere, thanks.

- Murk

[Megan] said...

oh Twills... i shouldn't be green with envy (i should just get off my sorry arse and do it too), but i am!! how exciting.

three things....

1. we need pictures
2. forget daycare, take your kids with you so they can see how awesome you are, even if you're falling on your ass
3. we need pictures

Twills said...

You totally should join! It's awesome! I'm working on getting more pictures... maybe I should just pilfer some off of our website.